Trapped In The Cupboard
by Zaztei
Summary: A sneak peak into what Muraki does in his mornings and then for the rest of the day when he's not trying to molest Tsuzuki. For both Muraki lovers and haters! MurakiOriya hilarity


Trapped In The Cupboard

A few birds chirped outside greeting everybody with their morning song, and the suns rays shone in through some long glass windows and onto a queen sized bed with silk crimson colored sheets. The man laying on the bed stirred when the sunlight hit his face and he instinctively brought up an arm which he placed over his eyes to block out the light. After a short moment however, he brought his arm away and he sat up; running a hand though his long silver bangs that covered one eye.

The man then yawned once before he began to sing in a way that the last word in each sentence was slightly higher pitched then all the others. "It's early in the morning…I'm just waking up." The man then ran a hand slowly down his bare muscular chest before he moved to his backside and onto his plaid boxers where he proceeded to scratch his ass. "I've got a rumble in my belly…" He paused as he wiggled one eyebrow and smiled in a very seductive way. He then continued with his singing. "I am Muraki…."

Rolling over Muraki sat on the edge of his bed, this time his hand scratching his balls. He yawned once more, then a voice, also singing in the same style as Muraki, called out to him from the door leading into the bedroom.

"Hey baby." Oriya then walked into the room; his purple flowered kimono open in the front revealing his bare chest and a matching pair of boxers. His long pipe hung limply between his lips and with both of his hands he held a wooden breakfast tray. Oriya gave his long smooth brown hair a sexy flip, so it flew behind him then he walked into the room towards Muraki; his hips swaying with each step.

Muraki quickly put on his glasses and he watched Oriya enter the room with unblinking eyes. He then ran his tongue slowly over his lips as he continued to watch him walk slowly towards him. Then shaking his head he mumbled under his breath, "Ooh damn, man I wish you were sixteen."

Oriya finally reached the bed and he pretended to not hear what Muraki said. Instead he put the breakfast tray down on the bed then sat behind Muraki; his arms snaking around his bare chest. "Here's your eggs and bacon, for your morning wakin." He then leaned down and he lightly kissed Muraki on a shoulder. "I love you baby…" Oriya paused in his singing as he moved up to kiss Murakis neck. He then gave him a seductive smile before he continued to sing. "Last night I wasn't faking…"

With a sigh Muraki shrugged Oriya off his shoulder and he tried not to look back at him. "Hey listen up, I've got to keep this real." Standing up from the bed he looked back at where Oriya had laid down on the bed; resting on his side and one of his hands trailing slowly along the edge of the breakfast tray. "This food sure looks good…" Muraki turned his head away from the scene. "But bitch, I want my cereal."

Muraki then reached down and he picked up his pants and shirt off the floor; quickly slipping them on. His tie and overcoat too were quickly flung on. He then sighed as he shook his head back and forth. "I can't believe these hoes…" Looking back at Oriya who was still laying on the bed and he continued. "Into the kitchen I goes, bitch I need my Cheerios."

Turning around to face the door Muraki began to walk out of the room; Oriya rolling off the bed to follow after him. However after a few steps Muraki stopped walking and he balled his hands into fists. "And I'm so damn mad!" Muraki held one of his hands out in front of him and he gave it a threatening shake. "I can hardly sing!"

There was a slight pause then Oriya took a few steps foreword; moving towards Muraki to give him a hug in an attempt to calm him down. After he had taken only a few steps however, Muraki whipped around to face him. "What?"

Oriya blinked confused. "What?"

Muraki raised an eyebrow and he continued to stare at Oriya. "What?"

Brining up his hands Oriya shrugged. "I didn't say anything."

Murakis eyes narrowed a bit and he pointed with one finger at the ground, he then continued to talk in a song like voice. "You just wait here, I'll get it my own damn self." With one arm he then pointed at the door. "The box is right where I left it." He then held up both of his arms so that they were parallel to each other. "It's on the middle shelf."

Whipping around Oriya quickly snatched something off the breakfast tray. Then turning back to face Muraki he held it up. "But what about your cinnamon bun?" He then waved the cinnamon bun slowly back and forth in the air trying to tempt Muraki.

Instead of being tempted to come back as Oriya hopped, Muraki reached into his overcoat and he pulled out a shiny silver gun which he pointed at Oriya. "I'll shoot you with this gun."

Oriya quickly backed off and Muraki glared at him. "Something's going on here." Muraki then put his gun back into his overcoat. "I'm gonna get to the bottom of this one."

Sighing Muraki turned away from Oriya and he walked out of the room. "So I'm going to the cupboard." After a short trip down a hallway, Muraki walked into the kitchen; his shoes clanking a bit on the white tiled floor and he made his way over towards several chestnut colored cupboards that lined the far wall.

Before he could reach the cupboards though, Oriya ran in from the other room and he stood in front of the cupboards; his arms up and over his head so that Muraki had no chance of opening them. He then shook his head back and forth; his long hair swooshing from side to side with each movement. "Don't go to the cupboard!"

"What? What's in the cupboard?"

Smiling Oriya tried to sing nonchalantly. "Who said anything about the cupboard?"

Frowning Muraki took a threatening step towards Oriya. "You're standing right in front of the cupboard."

Oriya threw his head back and he laughed nervously. "Oh is this the cupboard?" 

Growling Muraki placed one hand on Oriyas shoulder. "Man you know that's the cupboard." With one movement, Muraki shoved Oriya out of the way of the cupboard and forced him to sit on a chair. He then walked over to the cupboard and he pulled he door open. Reaching in he grabbed the familiar and friendly yellow box with big black letters spelling out '_Cheerios.' _However, when he tipped the box upside down only a few crumbs of his beloved cereal rolled out.

Blinking confused he shook the box a bit more then sung out to nobody in particular. "And my box was empty." He sniffled as one of his eyes twitched. He then sung so that the words began to grow quieter with each one and seemed to trail away. "Empty… empty… empty… empty…"

---An Unknown Amount Of Time Later...---

Muraki stood in a large building with shelves stocked full of brightly packaged food surrounding him on all sides. The built in lights overhead shone brightly and Muraki tried to keep his patience as he waited in line. He rocked back and forth on his heels; the bright green grocery basket hanging from his arm swaying with the movement. Finally he couldn't keep quiet any longer and he sang aloud to himself. "Well here I am, at the grocery store." He gestured at the basket hanging from one arm with his other hand. "Got my Cheerios and some milk to pour."

Turning around Muraki faced the very good looking man who was behind him in the checkout line. "I usually get 2, but now I'm going to try Soy." The man nodded his head at the milk choice and Muraki continued. "I need my proteins." Muraki then flexed his muscles and he smiled in a wicked and suggestive way. "I am a growing boy."

After a few sexy eyebrow wiggles Muraki turned away from the man behind him and he faced the old hag in front of him. Her hair was gray with streaks of white running through it and wrinkles had dominated her face. She wore a bright pink skirt with a matching shirt and wool sweeter and her back was slightly hunched over as she flipped through dozes of coupons with shaking hands trying to find the right one.

A moment of silence followed, then Muraki lost his patience and he glared at the old woman. "Oh woman in front of me, got all these coupons." Reaching up Muraki placed a hand on the womans shoulder and he turned her around. "Bitch, do you really need five cents off that damn coupon?"

The old womans eyes widened at what Muraki said. "Why I never!" Then in a huff she turned around, slapped some money on the counter, then she grabbed her groceries and all her coupons and stomped out of the store.

With the old woman finally gone Muraki took a giant step foreword so he was standing right in front of the cashier. He smiled politely as he placed his two items down on the counter and waited for her to scan them. The woman however just stared at Muraki with curious eyes. She then swooshed her long brown hair away from the front of her shirt to the back, revealing letters spelling out '_Yaoi, It's a pain in the ass…' _printed clearly across her chest.Bringing up a hand she pointed at Muraki and she smiled. "Hey, aren't you…"

Muraki nodded his head and he motioned with one of his hands to the floor and he glanced nervously around the store. "Yes keep it down."

The cashier woman smiled and she boldly sung out, "Sean Connery!"

For a moment Muraki just stared at the woman in a daze wonder what kind of drugs she was one or if she was just playing a joke. When she just smiled and nodded her head Muraki scowled. "I'll bust you in your f---ing face."

The man behind Muraki stared at him confused when he censored himself and he looked around to see if there was anything going on. Seeing nothing he just shrugged and took a step away from Muraki.

The woman running the cashier however, didn't even seem to notice so she just kept on smiling and singing to Muraki. "Please chill out man, there's no price in my hand." She sighed and she pulled out this giant book with thousands of pages and she slammed it down on the counter. "I've got to do a price check, I know Mr. Connery you'll understand."

Muraki threw his head back and he let out a loud sigh. Looking back down at the cashier he gave her an angry smile. "They're two for one, what's wrong with this place?" When the woman didn't look up from her price book Muraki grumbled he slammed his hands down on the counter; drawing her attention towards him. "Should we handle this the Christian way?" Muraki then reached into his overcoat and he pulled out his shiny gun and he pointed it at her. "I'll shoot you in your f---ing face!"

The good looking man behind Muraki dropped his grocery basket and he ran away from Muraki and hid behind a shelf of food. Once he was safely out of sight he shook his head back and forth sadly. Then he scooted a few boxes out of the way so he could look in the gap at what was going on. "First that guy censors himself, and now he pulls out a gun…what a psycho...he must be a doctor or something."

Meanwhile the cashier's eyes were slowly filling with tears and her lower lip trembled as she continued to look at the gun pointed at her. Finally she opened her mouth and screamed. "Security!"

Muraki waved both of his hands above his head. His finger accidentally squeezed the trigger on the gun causing it to fire a shot into the ceiling. Muraki slowly tilted his head up to look at the ceiling then he turned to look back at the cashier. "Oh sister please, cereal is all I need." Muraki then motioned with his hands as he went on to explain; careful this time to not shoot anything. "You see I went to my cupboard."

The cashier woman sighed and she crossed her arms across her chest. "Don't start with the cupboard."

"You should've seen my cupboard." Muraki said trying to get some sympathy.

The cashier sighed and she rested one of her hands on the counter the other one pointing at Muraki and she scowled at him. "I don't have time for all of that I'm a grocery store clerk not your therapist!"

Rolling his eyes Muraki turned away from the cashier and he dug into one of his pockets. He finally pulled out a red cell phone and he flipped it open; quickly punching in Oriyas number. "I'm coming home baby."

On the other line Oriya purred into the phone before he sung. "Do you miss me baby?"

Smiling Muraki opened his mouth to say something, though before he could, he heard a disturbing sound on Oriyas end. The evil 'Snap' 'Crackle' and 'Pop' of Rice Krispies as they sat in some milk ready to be eaten.

Closing the phone Muraki stared off into space and he sung out loud to himself each word slightly quieter then the last one and once again making it seem like they were trailing away. "Did I hear rice krispies…krispies…krispies…krispies…?"

---A Ridiculously Long Amount Of Time Later…---

Muraki sat in the drivers seat of a fancy black sports car. His hands angrily clutched the wheel as he swerved this way and that to avoid the traffic, not even caring the tiniest bit that he was on the wrong side of the highway.

He clutched the wheel harder causing his knuckles to loose color and turn white. He grumbled for a while then he went back to his singing. "So I'm driving home." He shook his head pissed and he flipped off a driver that was honking at him. "I just can't understand. He didn't buy my Cheerios, he bought his own damn brand."

Growling he pulled his gun out of his overcoat once more and he continued to drive; holding it in one hand. "I'm about to go O.J. Ya'll know what I mean." Still growing he rolled down his window and he shot out a drivers front two tires who dared to lift a certain finger at him. The car he shot swerved out of control and crashed into three more. Muraki however expertly dodged the wreckage and continued to speed his way down the highway. "But first I've got to race home, in his nice car that I jacked from a random bitch."

---???? Time Later…---

Muraki kicked the door to his house open and he stormed angrily into the bedroom where much to his surprise he saw Oriya laying on the bed still half naked and still smoking his pipe.

Oriya glanced up lazily from the magazine that he was reading though when he saw that it was Muraki he quickly sat up and he held a hand out in front of him; his eyes nervously darting around the room. "I know what you're thinking!" Oriya scooted against the beds headrest before he continued to sing. "That wasn't a crackle pop you heard! It was just pop rocks and the coke I'm drinking!"

Doing a quick survey of the room Muraki saw no coke can anywhere and he scowled at Oriya for his lie; one of his eyes twitching. "Hoe…Y-you…ummm…" Muraki paused and he placed a hand on his chin in thought. Finally he looked at Oriya. "I lost my thought…what am I doing here?"

Oriya pursed his lips together in though then after a short moment his eyes lit up. "You were mad at me for buying Rice Krispies instead of your Cheerios."

"Ah!" Muraki nodded his head. "That's right!" He paused again. "Damn it…I can't remember where I left off now."

"You were just calling me a hoe."

Muraki slapped a fist into the palm of his other hand. "Right, thanks Oriya."

"No problem."

Taking a step back Muraki regained his composer and he then walked towards Oriya again, this time singing. "Hoe…that's all I can say. Hoe." Reaching Oriya Muraki grabbed him by his kimono and he pulled him off the bed; dragging him over to the kitchen and to a table where a bowl sat. "Hoe, then what the, are these Rice Krispie crumbs doing in this bowl?"

Unable to come up with an answer Oriya just shrugged. Pissed Muraki reached into his over coat and pulled out his gun and pointed it at Oriya once again. "That's it I'm going to end this story hoe!"

Before he could pull the trigger however, the door to the house was kicked down and a cop in his full blue uniform, hat and all, came running in; the woman from the grocery cash register right behind him. The woman pointed at Muraki and the cop began to run over.

"Oh shit! It's the PoPo!" Seeing that the door was still blocked with the woman Muraki made a dash for the cupboard. Opening it he tried to squeeze his way into it though before he could even get his first leg all the way in the cop grabbed him by the back of his overcoat and he pulled him out.

Growing Muraki twisted his head so he could look at the cop who was handcuffing him. "Hey officer! What's up with you people?"

The cop tipped his hat further up on his head to give him a look of more authority then he answered in a singing voice. "You pulled your gun out four times today on innocent people!"

"Look cop, I can't go to jail!" Muraki pleaded. "I've got more people to molest and torture!" The cop however didn't let up on his grasp so Muraki began to squirm and wiggle trying to shake the cops grip off of his overcoat so he could make a run for it. He stopped however when a thought entered his mind. "Wait…there's a lot of hot ass in jail!" Muraki laughed evilly. "Oh that should be fun indeed!"

The cop then led Muraki out of the house and put him in the back of his cop car. Before he could drive away however, Oriya ran over, still only wearing his open robe and his boxers and he leaned down so he could see in though the open back window. "I'll come and break you out in about three hours or so."

Muraki nodded his head and the cop car drove away. As it was driving away Oriya waved at it with a white handkerchief. "Ta-ta!"

Moving back in the house Oriya saw that the grocery store woman had left so he just shrugged and walked back into the bedroom. After a short moment of thought he laid back down on the bed, having decided to just look sexy for the next three hours.

Trapped In The Cupboard…The End


End file.
